The idea of the Reluctant Feminist has been in my head for some time...oh, say, since shortly after I left my career to support the husband and quickly found myself screaming "WHAT THE HELL HAVE I DONE?!"
Granted, every square inch of life turned upside-down for me at that exact time...I moved halfway across the country en route to who-knew-Where-In-The-World-Is-Carmen-Sandiego, became a mother, quit my job, buried my daughter, battled indescribable grief, moved again - although only 1/4 of the way around the world - and sloooowly began to put my life back together.
I have found "real" work hard to come by in the expat life. With frequent moves and settling in, I barely got comfortable before it was time to do it all over again. Indeed, I *have* found my way in each location, even if brief. I've searched high-and-low until something "stuck"...and had some beyond-incredible experiences.
But, that feeling of "something is still missing" has never really left me. I knew (HOPED!) I couldn't be alone. But, I couldn't quite get my arms around what was circling in those crazed-by-self-pity-and-no-outlet-for-ME thoughts.
Now, basking in the Caribbean sun, The Reluctant Feminist has come to life!
An amazing artist and childhood friend, Eric Carl, designed an amazing logo! (Notice the new look?! More changes to come...stay tuned!)
An amazing group of women have come forward as fellow RFs, and through monthly get-togethers we are exploring that balance so desperately needed in a woman's life. Each evening has been energizing, motivating and encouraging.
And, I *know* there are more of you out there...because many of us have already connected even though we're (thousands of) miles apart.
And, amazingly, I feel more - gasp - balanced!
And, I love it.
So, in honor of said progress, it's time to kick my own self in the heiny and stop feeling sorry for myself making excuses and WRITE again!
Now is the time to make TRF the priority I wanted it to be. Let's boost this conversation about that ever-elusive balance between Mommy-hood, Wife-dom, climbing-the-corporate-ladder-or-building-your-own and YOU!
I came across this quote the other day:
"I long to accomplish a great and noble task, but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks as if they were great and noble."
- Helen Keller
Uh, why, Thank You, Universe! Message received, loud and clear!
It has been entirely too long since my last whining session post. That time has passed with holidays, too much effort spent on daily mundane necessities, lots of exploration of ideas, a few weekend get-aways, some lovely celebrations with new friends, and - I'm embarrassed to admit - continued evaluation of what I want to be when I grow up.
Some opportunities came, some went, some were pushed out the window.
Long-story-short, I am truly no closer to finding that elusive calling I so desperately seek. I continue to listen for that quiet little voice that sometimes whispers of just the hint of possibility of the greatness that may come.
And, do you know what I remembered (once again)??
I have many opportunities to be great staring me in the face, every single day of my life...And, I ain't doing such a great job at any of 'em! (Read with a drawl-ed sarcasm!)
Yes, I have three wee ones who, despite my outsourced role, depend on me to be their human Google, roadside assistance, chef, chauffeur, teacher, referee and run to the door with outstretched arms each time I come home; I have a husband who wishes I could find that damn calling so I'd shut up about it and get back to being happy (read with endearing understanding of his intentions); I have family whom I miss dearly but am often too tired to call every time I think of telling them something; and I have friends literally around the world that I am very inconsistent about keeping up with even though hearing their voices would bring me such energy.
So, today's lesson??
Try to do a better job at what I do have right now.
